When you feel like a failure

Yesterday, Starla, today so sick. Raw stinging throat pounding headache. Disrespectful teenagers. I slept after Bible study, and through my lunch break. 

I didn't have my journal on me when I blogged yesterday, but I wanted to share an excerpt from yesterday and then today, because they fit. 

"I feel like I've failed in a million ways. 

But God. 

Those two words are such a tremendous relief for the burdens of my soul. Knowing that The Lord ordained this day, event and time from eternities past reminds me that he makes all things work together for my good and his glory. If I release my control and am satisfied in his wisdom and strength, then he is so glorified in my trials! 

(Right after I wrote that, I read John 11) 

Joy thiefs today: fatigue. SORE throat. Anxiety. Jesus you are bigger...

Hard night. So hard. 

Jesus Jesus how I need you Jesus" 

1. Thankful to serve a King who comes when I call

2. Thankful for Lecrae and all the 1:16 guys for making really cool music. Unashamed of the gospel, unashamed of the glory their talent brings to God

3. Thankful for a really amazing group of people to study the Bible and the church with

4. Thankful for being able to be at Trader Joe's five minutes after opening on a week day 

5. Thankful for Kathy and Lenny inviting me to their home for Thanksgiving! 

I am so blessed. How easily I forget it, how desperately I need to remember. 

Edit: my phone didn't feel like publishing this yesterday so now they're out of rider. Sorry