Today, during my lunch/study time, Beloit put its emergency text/call/email alert plan into action. They told us:
"Beloit College is experiencing an emergency situation on campus. Stay where you are, lock your door and stay away from windows until further instructions are provided.
This is an automated message intended to quickly warn you of this threat. Specific details are coming ASAP. Until then, TAKE COVER. Do not open your door for anyone unless they can positively identify themselves as law enforcement officials or emergency responders. This is NOT a test. More information is coming"
It was pretty scary. I had been alone in a room in a central building - and I stepped outside as an entire body received that information. We didn't know what to do or where to go; we had questions - what is this emergency situation - and our hearts leapt to the worst.
Could there be a gunman, here?
Is that possible?
You don't want to think so, but then again,
Why Aurora?
Why Newton?
Did they ever think that it could be them?
Texts came pouring in from my friends, as we all wanted to make sure the other was safe and give assurance that we were all in this together, confused and a little afraid.
I cancel my 1:00 with our staff worker. He says, be safe. He'll pray. Keep him posted
After what felt like far too long, we were told: there is a person wandering a few blocks from campus, believed to be armed. Remain where you are.
Someone just walked by, in the hallway outside my room, appropriately enough, "The Spirituality Room", saying, "I think I heard a gun shot"
My heart leapt a little.
I wanted to know, where is this person? What is going on? If he/she is near me, then Betsy and Alissa are safer. If this person is near them, I am safer.
29 minutes have ticked by, fast and slow all at the same time.
Betsy just said - Near kappa delta. Definitely a gun.
Far from me.
Close to her.
She said her and her roommate are sitting near the bathroom, feeling like puking.
And even if there are no causalities, none wounded, none killed, violence has won, because in these moments, we do not feel 100% safe.
I text my pastor's wife, remembering she works here. She left work early today. She is praying from home.
It is now 39 minutes since the first text, 18 since the second.
No more information.
If it were just one gun, with the Beloit Police, wouldn't it be ok by now?
Is this a precaution; how real is this?
We sit and wait. Texting. Refreshing our emails. Watching. Waiting.
Praying.
Maddie is very upset. I texted her Romans 8:31 awhile ago. We've been connected through our phones, rejoicing over our Father's ultimate goodness.
Alissa thinks there is some follow up going on - just to be sure.
Betsy asks if I heard sirens.
I didn't. Did she?
No.
So it's a quiet emergency that is speaking volumes in its silence.
46 minutes in. Still remembering that instant visceral worry concern fear. Hoping to receive the all clear soon, and go back to normal.
Normal.
Because we have a much better chance of that than the communities in which innocents died. We faced the potential, so maybe we have a small taste of understanding, but I hold to my original sentiments that we will not know what it is like to be ravaged by senseless violence until we are. When the potentiality becomes an actuality, we might know.
52 minutes in, a reminder to stay put. Details to come.
Another text from Betsy - twitter is getting real funny.
It is.
We all feel pretty ok at this point, so we're making jokes.
Will those with 2pm class still have to go?
Will we have to run outside this afternoon?
Nap time
Drinking time
What kind of food do I have in my room time.
1 hour in
This is not a terribly interesting live blog. I'm hoping this is over by 2, because I have stuff to do outside the spirituality room. My laptop battery also only has about an hour and a half of juice left.
This is not a terribly interesting live blog. I'm hoping this is over by 2, because I have stuff to do outside the spirituality room. My laptop battery also only has about an hour and a half of juice left.
70 minutes in, I remember to be glad I brought my laptop with me at all this morning.
I suddenly just want to take a nap.
You would think if you couldn't do anything else, you might actually do your homework. This is proving is be only a half truth for me. Clearly.
76 minutes. I'm getting bored. I have one more chapter of my Ethics of Evangelism book to annotate, food hole supplies to buy, neon outfits to select, conference to pack for, nails to paint purple and sparkly. I'm assuming, of course, that the lack of further information means that things are getting less serious and not more. Also, we are getting dangerously close to my 2pm mark here.
I guess my strange Monday was only the beginning of an even stranger week.
80 minutes in, Betsy says that the gun guy is in the apartment complex next to the sorority. She doesn't have to go to her class.
We're going to present our graduation speech at 10pm on Monday. How strange. But we weren't available Friday or Saturday or Sunday or any other time Monday. I wonder if Justine, the class officer with whom I communicated, realized that I always used the "we", only needing to consult Betsy for one of the half dozen questions. It reminds me of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants character, Lena, saying that "We...are us"
95 minutes in, converted the word document of our speech draft to kindle. I'm not bringing my computer this weekend, and I just learned how to do that thanks to amazon tech support chat yesterday. It looks just like any other kindle book. It's pretty cool. You can also do things like make pdfs of the library book chapter you need and send those to kindle. SO COOL.
I'm really impressed with technology.
I'll let you know when this lockdown sitch is over.
Just realized that I had a handful of lockdowns last year. Weird.
100 minutes in, we are now free to move around whatever building we're in. I wish I were at home (read: my room). Hopefully this means we're closing in on freedom.
Oh, and I did finish my book. 46 minutes remain for my laptop.
114 minutes in, and now my laptop has 1:10. This is weird.
We have now hit the two hour mark. I might stop telling you the time frame in minutes now.
2 hours, 25 minutes in. Received word from good old Beloit College to stay indoors on lockdown. Laptop battery has 36 minutes left. Trying to conserve. Doing my reading for Tuesday class. The pros of having your fully loaded backpack with you during a lock down. I still wish I'd been in my room, though.
And so, 2 hours and 40 minutes in, we received the all clear sign.
Lockdown over.
yikes.
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