Here Comes Sandy

Hurricanes. Never experienced one. I've been a midwestern girl all my life. Although the brute of the storm shouldn't get to upstate NY, we're on flood warnings, and the weather has taken a turn for the cold and rainy and foggy. We may lose power. I am doing well, and we are preparing for the worst.

The Comforter

I've shared a few Andrew Murray quotes, but I think I've kept these two to myself. They are some of my very favorites.

"Our hearts are continually prone to wander from HIm; prosperity and enjoyment all too easily satisfy us, dull our spiritual perception, and unfit us for full communion with HImself. It is an unspeakable mercy that the FAther comes with His chastisement, makes the world round us all dark and unattractive, leads us to more deeply feel our sinfulness, and for a time lose our joy in what was becoming so dangerous. He does it in the hope that, when we have found our rest in Christ in time of trouble, we shall learn to choose abiding in HIm as our only portion; and when the affliction is removed, have so grown more firmly into Him, that in prosperity He still shall be our only joy"

"When God comforts, it is that He may turn the bleeding heart to Himself to receive the blessing in fellowship with Him; when He refuses comfort, His object is the same. The Holy Spirit is the Comforter, not only because He can suggest comforting thoughts of God's love, but far more, because He makes us holy, and brings us into close union with Christ and with God. He teaches us to abide in Christ; and because God is found there, the truest comfort will com there too"

One Day?

Since I last posted, 500,000 things have happened (or so it feels).

I had to goodbye to the beloved Colorado house. I hate that! And Beth ALWAYS makes me cry. I'm totally fine until I hear her sweet voice and sad eyes saying, "I love you Kate". We had an awesome time of worship, though, and then two people prayed over each of the J127 crew. Predictably, Courtney prayed over me. Apparently I'm the only one for whom her sensitive side comes out. Who knew? Michael Mastro, whose talk had a huge influence on me, also felt led to me, and he nailed me as he prayed! Amazing what the Spirit can do. He said that he felt God saying to keep praying Proverbs 16:3 every day. More on that in a sec.

First, an amusing anecdote.

Hana (age 9): Where are you going, anyway?
Me: Back to New York
Hana: And then to Africa!
Me: Hana girl, I already went to Africa. While you were in Asia.
Hana: Oh good, then you get to come back here!
Me: I have to go back to school.
Hana: *distressed sad face*
Me: But I'm almost done.
Hana: Then you get to come back here and stay with us forever and ever every single day and never leave!
Me: *awkward muttering*, as Hana scurries away in the way only adorable little girls get away with
Courtney: Careful, that one's prophetic.
Beth: Yep. Yep she is.

Anywho, then we drove down to Ellerslie training school, run by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I've read all their books and listened to most of Eric's sermons and I'm a diligent reader of Leslie's magazine. #imafan

They had a quiet worship night, that was super amazing. Remember how I was supposed to be praying the same verse every day? Yeah, that sounded super boring to me. The environment at Ellerslie, though, got my heart in the right place. During worship, things were so free, and I got this hugely long word from God that was convicting, but oh so good. I love how He works like that.

I had a great time rooming with two of the girls, and we were quite lively. Too lively in fact. Oops

This morning, we went to 5:30 am prayer, which sounds hideous, but the campus is brilliant. And Eric taught on prayer. The man wrote the book, Wrestling Prayer, and he was teaching this morning. Epic.

At breakfast, I had a good time talking with the ellerslie students, and then chapel.

But first, amusing anecdote 2

Me: It's so beautiful
Katherine: Kate, you could get married here (it's a wedding venue).
Me: *awkward giggle*
Katherine: Remind me, I have a list saved for you.
Me: *thought cloud* the girl gets engaged and then starts planning all the weddings

Chapel was great, with devotions on holiness followed by worship. Then Eric gave a message on grace. Even though I'd heard it before, it was great. And like I said, the whole ellerslie atmosphere really helped me out.

AND THEN
We had lunch with Eric and Leslie! Q&A. Eric though he'd met me before, and I suddenly got panicked, as if maybe I'd forgotten. I don't think I would have. Anyway, they were of course wonderful, and I took tons of notes all day. Katherine though will lead us into amusing anecdote 3. She said, "I'm engaged, and the ones who are single will probably be headed into marriage type relationships in the near future...how can they prepare and what are tips for getting to know someone when you know it's going somewhere but it's not there yet?"

Near future. Ya catch that?

Our room did. Amusing anecdote 3

Victoria: Did you hear that?
Me: Um yes! Not me!
Victoria: Why? I definitely think you should be the first of us to get married.
Me: Why?
Victoria: Because you love marriage. You love love. You guys could read the book of Hosea every day.

I laughed SO HARD.

Then we roadtripped to somewhere in Nebraska.

Cue tumbleweeds

Nebraska is a long state to drive across.

I had a really good time with the cool kids in the way back - Amanda and Lady V. Amanda told me her testimony, which is something I've  wanted to ask about for a little while. I also worked on my paper. Otherwise, I just sat and talked some. They told me their dogs' favorite movies. Weird.

Jeopardy totally counts as watching t.v.

Documentaries are great.

Day two tomorrow. We're staying somewhere in Michigan or Indiana with a family who owns a dairy queen.

Commit your works to the Lord and your thoughts will be established. Proverbs 16:3

And yes, this was all in an approximately 30 hour time frame.

Wrecking Ball

Sidewalk Prophets

Father, Father

I need to rip out this old tree
Father, Father
The roots of lust and greed
Have grown so deep into this ground
I’ve tried so hard to pull them out
On my own, they take the best of me

Chorus
I need a wrecking ball
Slamming inside my heart
Breaking me all apart
Tearing the old away
Killing the fear in me
Until I can finally breathe
Even if it hurts so bad that I can’t even stand
Take it all, let me fall into Your hands

Father, Father
You have brought me to my knees
Father, Father
You long for me to see
When I get lost along the path
You will fight to bring me back
Only You, can make the best of me

Chorus

Hands where mercy lives where grace begins
With Your hands knock down all these walls I’m praying

I need a wrecking ball
Slamming inside my heart
Breaking me all apart
Tearing the old away
Killing the fear in me
Until I can finally breathe
Even if it hurts so bad that I can’t even stand
Take it all, break it all, Take my all
Let me fall into Your hands

Father, Father
I need to rip out this old tree

Happy Sweetest Day!

Jesus, the sweetest name and presence I'll ever know

No Sweeter Name

I've been going through Abide in Christ by Andrew Murray, and while every day is amazing, today lined up so perfectly with Sweetest Day, so I thought I'd share some excerpts

Abide in Christ Day 22: And in His Love
As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you; abide ye in my love. John 15:9

"Love is not an attribute, but the very essence of His nature, the centre round which all His glorious attributes gather. It was because He was love that He was the Father, and that there was a Son"

"As one of His redeemed cries, thou art His delight, and all His desire is to thee, with the longing of a love which is stronger than death, and which many waters cannot quench. His heart yearns after thee, seeking thy fellowship and thy love. Were it needed, He could die again to possess thee"

"When it was needed, He sacrificed His throne and crown for thee. His righteousness, His Spirit, HIs glory, even His throne, all are thine. This love holds nothing, nothing back, but, in a manner which no human mind can fathom, makes thee one with itself"

"Love gives all, but asks all. It does so, not because it grudges us aught, but because without this it cannot get possession of us to fill us with itself"

"In our entering into His love to abide there, it must be so too; our surrender to it must have no other measure than its surrender to us"

How Deep the Father's Love For Us

Starfish

This week, I volunteered at and sat in on the Starfish Community Expo, an international network of for Business Development, Humanitarian Aid, Disaster Relief, Angel Alert, and Social Media training. It was incredible to be with so many doers and leaders in the global community. I feel so blessed to get to do school like this.

Throughout the course of the week I met with people working in China, North Korea, Mauritania, Kenya, Ghana, Niger, Nigeria, Cambodia, Lebanon, Indonesia, Malaysia, the US, and probably more that I can't even remember.

People shared opportunities to:
Work with children in Ghana
Help pregnant women in China
Run a coffeehouse in China, along the North Korean border (my personal favorite)
Work in an office in Kenya
Come work in the church in Niger

So. I have options, lol.

I even dyed my hair purple for a day, raising money for GOV's Asia trip this winter. Who else can say they dyed their hair purple in a bathroom at Focus on the Family?

Plenty of other silliness as well as meaningful insight came out of this week. Sadly, it's almost time to go back to New York. I love The Mission, but I'm certain I love Colorado more. This weekend, we're packing up and heading out.

A Unique Plan

Tonight, I sit having been at two different teen/parent events. I've been doing crazy amounts of research on the creation of a born again identity in a post modern world, from every perspective. I've been helping to mentor students, and being poured into myself. I get to worship every day with people I love, and experience the presence of the Lord constantly. I am in Conesus, New York, but tomorrow I'm going to Pennsylvania to meet one of my favorite authors, Dannah Gresh! Then I'm Colorado bound to meet up with some world-class leaders. All while working on putting together the final touch for my academic undergrad career.

In case you haven't picked up on it, I am floored! I am beyond blessed, and in this moment I had to share this. I don't know anyone else exactly like me, splitting her last years of college between Africa and internships away, while getting hands on research done for a senior thesis. I never could have guessed that this would happen, that my life would turn out this way.

I want to encourage everyone reading, that God means it when He says He has a future and a purpose for you (Jeremiah 29:11). That's not a joke. And the plan He has for you won't be the plan He has for anyone else. It starts right with a verse that's been on my heart for so long - Psalm 16:11

You make known to me the paths of life
In your presence is fullness of joy
At your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

In Christ, our joy is full; it's complete and all satisfying.

Oh Beloit

Beloit College, where you hand in a paper from 579 miles away, and receive this as feedback:

You are responsible for what you know.

I also now have mad respect for people who go to school while working full time. It's not easy.

THERE IS POWER

Someone very very very very special to me met Jesus! After years of praying, she was convicted of her need for the Lord and He found her! I found out just 8 minutes before we were supposed to start a teen event, so I leapt up and showed my leaders and asked for a few minutes to call her quickly. AHHHHH

Everyone said I was glowing! I know I was! I couldn't stop crying and smiling and faithfulness and awe just surrounded me. Her path has been so dark, that it seemed hopeless, but I remember getting Hosea 2:23 as a promise in one of the most hopeless, depressing times. God is able to do more than we would ever imagine! Everyone let out a cheer when I shared later at worship. I was in tears from beginning to end, being 700 miles away but never having felt closer to the special girl with whom I've shared almost my entire life. For the first time, she could sing those songs too! What an incredible thing!

Almost 8 hours after I found out, a friend said, "Just so you know, you're still glowing!" I picked up a pretty pink Bible for her, and highlighted some of the verses I've been praying for her over the years. That's getting sent out tomorrow.

There is incredible power in the blood of the Lamb!

There's Power In The Blood

Would you be free from your burden of sin?
There's power in the blood, power in the blood
Would you o'er evil the victory win?
There's wonderful power in the blood

Would you be whiter, much whiter than snow?
There's power in the blood, power in the blood
Sin stains are lost in it's life-giving flow
There's wonderful power in the blood

There is power, power, wonder-working power
In the blood of the Lamb
There is power, power, wonder-working power
In the precious blood of the Lamb

Would you do service for Jesus your King?
There's power in the blood, power in the blood
Would you live daily His praises to sing?
There's wonderful power in the blood

There is power, power, wonder-working power
In the blood of the Lamb
There is power, power, wonder-working power
In the precious blood of the Lamb

Power, Power, Wonder working power
In the blood of the Lamb
There is power, power, wonder-working power
In the precious blood of the Lamb

A Giggle

I'm sitting in the kitchen when two friends walk in.

"What are you doing?"

"Drinking tea. Listening to rap. Reading about a 19th Century revivalist (Robert Murray M'Cheyne)"

"And you're not nauseous?"

Taking Out the Trash

But history repeats itself
Evil's what it is
Cause Lucifer was cast away for doing what I did
Created by the God who spoke the earth into existence
Instead of chasin the Father's glory, he was chasin his
He lies to us all
Told Adam he could ball
Why you followin God when you could go get it all
I'll tell you what's better
Or better yet worse
Chasin your own glory while doin the Lord's work
So holler if it hurts
Cause we were made for greater
Our greatest satisfaction is making His name famous
So if we're never named among the greatest, they don't critically acclaim us
Ain't nothin to be ashamed of - we gave it up for the Savior

There's a reason that Chase That has been one of my favorite songs for over a year now. It's so true. And now, I'm learning about a whole other level. Remember those iniquity patterns from Isaiah 14? They come from Satan's exact line of thinking. They outline how he fell and where we go wrong.

I can have some worship
I can have more worship
I can have all the worship
That worship belongs to me
Why should I share my worship?
God is taking my worship
He has no right to take it
I must discredit Him so that I can get all the worship.

As Mimi teaches on iniquity, there have been so many "ouch" and "whoa" moments. It's so convicting, having all of our foul motives laid bare, but also so fulfilling. The Lord wants to fill us up, so the garbage must come out.