Privileged to Love

This morning at church, our pastor preached the beginning of Haggai. My heart was full and my mind set on Tina, my beautiful, brave sister in Georgia who is suffering now. I ache for her. She is one of my absolute favorite people in the world, and I so deeply desire her joy, especially that full joy Christ came to deliver.

The apostle Paul wrote,

I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh. Romans 9:2-3


That Paul could love a people so much that he'd rather they know peace in Christ than himself used to be an utterly incomprehensible love to me.

Enter Christina

I don't know what it is about her. We are such unlikely friends. It is amazing we even met. There have been countless more opportunities to let it all go than to pursue each other. We see each other once or twice a year if we're lucky. We're deep introverts terrified of phone calls. We are busy, with our own communities and opposite sides of the country. But despite all this, she is my person. I can't help but recall Hazel and her dad in the Fault in our Stars, talking about her short lived relationship with the terminally ill Gus, "but it sure was a privilege to love him, huh?". It is a serious privilege and gift from God to love Tina.

Our pastor today in Haggai said that we get so caught up in what God might be calling us to in our futures, that we forget what He has already called us to right now. He said, "If you don't know where to start, read your Bible and love people. Your friends. Your neighbors. Your kids. Your spouse. God is calling every one of us to love right now"

I think loving Tina feels like such a gift, because she keeps offering it to me, gently, day by day. When hurting people let you be their people, it's a big deal. I have never taken her trust lightly. Loving her has been wild and messy and aching and silly and a chaotic. But behind it all, I've seen Jesus so clearly, drawing us to each other, to Him, and to the redemption for which all creation groans.

What a privilege indeed.